


A Series of Nouns

by Nightingale_Rising



Series: On My Mind [1]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: CW: Discussion of Depression, CW: References to self harm, CW: attempted suicide, Fluff and Angst, Gen, I Promise it Ends Happy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-03
Updated: 2018-03-03
Packaged: 2019-03-26 08:01:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13853445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightingale_Rising/pseuds/Nightingale_Rising
Summary: Viktor has not been fine since he a learned how to say "I'm Fine."





	A Series of Nouns

 

_Depression turns you into a series of nouns, without the adjectives and without the verbs. You don’t remember where you misplaced your descriptions, your actions (under the sink with your emotions). You become:_

_bed,_

_shower,_

_socks,_

_coffee,_

_keys,_

_obligations._

_-A Series of Nous_

 

Ice.

Practice.

Lights.

Flowers.

Cheers.

He had a hard time remembering not feeling this way. The memories he did had felt like a fairy tale, a fading dream. Not that it mattered anyways. What reason did Viktor Nikiforov have to be depressed? He was a man on top of the world. Everything he ever wanted handed to him on a silver platter. So why did he have so many days where all he wanted was for it all to end?

Ice.

Practice.

Fall.

Break.

Hospital

He was careful. Found just the right places no one would ask questions. The area’s that even in the more risqué photo shoots the thin slivery lines wouldn’t show. He became very good at lying, all it took was a smile and a “I’m fine.” It took blaming his forgetfulness when he took a few to many pain killers for his broken leg. If anyone knew that he was well aware he had already taken his dose for a day they didn’t say a thing.

Vodka.

Hangover.

Rink.

Practice.

Makkachin.

Makkachin helped. She got him out of bed. Her needing him was enough to keep on living, if only for her. She was the only one he ever told about how he really felt. She would understand, she wouldn’t judge him for being so selfish to not be happy with all the blessings he had in life. He could fall asleep crying into her fur and know she would never think less of him.

Practice.

Competition.

Gold.

Champion.

_Dancing._

Yuuri Katsuki was like a drunken hurricane coming in and throwing his dull live for a loop. He could pinpoint the moment where for the first time in a long time he didn’t feel like he was just distracting himself from being sad. It happened in the middle of their dance and Yuuri dipped him. Time had stopped in that one moment, his cheeks ached from smiling all night. He closed his eyes relishing the feeling of comfort in Yuuri’s arms and he felt _alive._

Nationals.

Osen.

Coach.

Eros.

Rings.

It wouldn’t be until a month after Barcelona that Viktor would admit to Yuuri how he felt. He had felt ashamed for how long he had kept it hidden from his fiancé. He wanted Yuuri to know everything about him, even the darkest parts of himself. Yuuri held him through the confession, he had been the one to hold Viktor’s hand through the first appointment with the kind eyed woman. Three months and one prescription later Viktor finally got to see that he would not have to spend the rest of his life just going through the motions. His life could be filled with:

_Caring._

_Laughter._

_Understanding._

_Life._

_Love._

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [tumblr as BardicKnowledge](http://bardicknowledge.tumblr.com/)  
> If you liked the fic please like, comment and subscribe for more fics like this.


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